Friday, April 3, 2009
A view from the patio
It's another beautiful night, and I'm sitting here appreciating it for once. I've been in the self pity mode for the last few weeks. Work is hectic and a drag, home is a zoo, and the D/s in my relationship seems to have flown out the window with TM's new hobby.
I could sit here and remind myself that I am as much to blame, but I'm in a self righteous mode. I do enough without having to remind him that he's supposed to be the dominant in this relationship. I've done it numerous times, reminding him about his job description. It lasts for awhile and then falls by the wayside. It's all well and good, but then don't sit there and tell me the beast needs to come out and a beating is long overdue.
That to me is just wrong. You want that, go find a play partner to satisfy that urge. If you don't think that the d/s in our relationship is important to nurture, ok fine, but don't expect me to be subservient when you deem it necessary to impart a scene.
Sometimes when I get this way I find that it's cyclical with my menses, but it's not PMS this time around.
The question is, is the relationship itself strong enough to go through these challenges. Yes, I believe it it, but there comes a point where when you look in the mirror, reality hits you in the face.
I could sit here and remind myself that I am as much to blame, but I'm in a self righteous mode. I do enough without having to remind him that he's supposed to be the dominant in this relationship. I've done it numerous times, reminding him about his job description. It lasts for awhile and then falls by the wayside. It's all well and good, but then don't sit there and tell me the beast needs to come out and a beating is long overdue.
That to me is just wrong. You want that, go find a play partner to satisfy that urge. If you don't think that the d/s in our relationship is important to nurture, ok fine, but don't expect me to be subservient when you deem it necessary to impart a scene.
Sometimes when I get this way I find that it's cyclical with my menses, but it's not PMS this time around.
The question is, is the relationship itself strong enough to go through these challenges. Yes, I believe it it, but there comes a point where when you look in the mirror, reality hits you in the face.
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